Sunday, I met a homeless man on the street (I wrote about it here). I called him “sir” when I spoke to him. I did it out of habit (Thank you, Carol! You were a positive influence :)). He reacted interestingly, “Ooooh, he called me sir!?” His reaction showed that didn’t happen too often. He introduced himself by first and last name, Gregory Brown. I introduced myself. Then I went to throw out some broken glass I had picked up from the street. My wife was in the car. She overheard Gregory talking to himself about how cool it was that I called him sir. It made his day. A simple respectful word lifted him up.
It’s easy to treat those who have authority or position with respect. Even if we don’t want to or mean it. They have control, power over our lives. “Yes, Mr. Puddingbottom. That’s a brilliant idea, sir!” or “No ma’am, I didn’t realize I was doing 42 over the limit.” When we behave respectfulness towards those with leverage over us it doesn’t tell much about the quality or depth of our character. It can just be a veil of selfishness or self-protection.
Respect is about supporting someone’s humanity, honor and dignity. We give respect freely to those with leverage – position, authority, money. How freely do we give it to those without leverage?
The homeless guy asking for food. The employee who has a new idea. The waiter who got the order wrong. The parent who brings out the adolescent 15 year old in you when you’re 40. The customer service agent getting $9.72/hour to deal with angry people all day. These are the people it’s easy to poop on.
How do you show respect to the person who does not have leverage over you? That might show more about your character. Who will you surprise today by supporting their humanity, honor and dignity?
You want respect? Respect the least for the most respect.
