Are you putting the pieces of the puzzle together?

  Jen was frustrated with me.  We were talking about something that was on going for two months.  I was giving her bits and pieces.  She asked a question.  I'd go back into something I told her about 4 weeks before and talk about that.  She asked another question.  I fast forward to another conversation we had a week after the conversation that I went back into for the previous question she asked.  Then I came back to the present.  Confusing! Pieces of the puzzle were all over the … [Read more...]

How do you win the battle of will?

I love feeding my girls.  They're 7 months old.  They don't know what they're doing.  It's a socio-science experiment.  What will they like?  What will they hate?  Will they clamp their mouth shut?  Will Ellie like one thing and Evie another? Jen and I treat every bite like it's fun and tasty.  "Mmmmmm", "Yummmyyyyy", "Yaaaaaaay".   We smile.  We pretend like we're chewing and swallowing. I learned quickly that it's not about them eating the food.  It's about enjoying the experience of … [Read more...]

The Faithful Sacrifice

  Faith is beyond belief.  It is a trust that engenders action.  It is seen when we leap, trusting the net will appear.  Don't trust that a net will appear?  You'll just stand on the ledge.  Waiting. Many have ideas they believe in.  How many have faith in those ideas?  Those who believe talk about how they know the idea is great.  Those with faith do something to make it real. Entrepreneurs are towers of faith.  They fight to make their idea become real in the world.  They believe … [Read more...]

Step away from the elephant

I found myself standing in front of a grey wall.  I felt like I encountered an insurmountable obstacle.  Then I reached out to to the wall. Odd, it's rough and warm.  I look around.  I step away.  I see an elephant. The only way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time.  First, you need to know you have elephant to eat.  Sometimes we get to close.  We lose perspective.  We get lost in the perspective.. Step away from the elephant.  Then pick your first bite. Related articles On … [Read more...]

How amazing is your grace?

Familiarity breeds contempt. Spend more time with someone and you'll get jaded.  You'll  take things for granted, and get angry over smaller things.  Hot buttons will emerge.  They'll be easier to punch as time goes on. This is probably why marriage can be so hard. It's easier to forgive the waitress who screwed up your food order than it is the wife who forgot to put the cap back on the toothpaste ... again. Grace doesn't dwell well in a world of presumed outcomes. We force grace out of … [Read more...]

Reach out and touch someone

  More people are watching porn than ever before. A recent poll showed that 79% of people are consuming porn nowadays. It was in the 30% range in 1983. The studies also show people are having less sex. They are masturbating more. We are a lazy species. We will do the thing that costs us the least. Contact and direct interaction are expensive. They require real-time emotional engagement. They require processing of non-verbal nuance. They require empathy and awareness. This is one … [Read more...]

How nourishing is your life?

Ellie, the younger twin, was fighting the bottle.  She'd take the nipple.  Chew and suck.  Then spit out milk and pout.  It was frustrating. Jen took her.  Ten minutes later the bottle was emptied.  I asked Jen what she did to make Ellie eat.  She told me.  I barely believed her.  She did it again the next time.  It worked.  And it still does. Jen encouraged Ellie.  She'd tell her in a sweet voice how good she was being and what a good little eater she was.  Ellie ate.  No … [Read more...]

How are you preparing for the parade?

We looked at each other.  The babies crying in the background.  "Should we respond?" We created a routine to help the babies learn to sleep.  Sometimes that meant letting them cry for a few minutes.  It was hard.  Very hard. On Christmas Eve, we woke up.  The babies slept through the night.  9 weeks old (5 weeks based on full term).  Mission accomplished! I'd mention we wanted the babies to sleep through the night as our Christmas present.  People would scoff at me.  They told me I … [Read more...]

All I want for Christmas is…

Jen's whispered, "C'mon.  It's time to feed the babies."   All I want for Christmas is for my babies to sleep through the night. I've told so many people that my Christmas present would be the twins sleeping through the night.  These were typical responses: "Keep dreaming...." "My babies are a year old. They still don't sleep through the night." "That's not going to happen." "Good luck with that..." Not encouraging words.  They're actually the complete opposite.  The people … [Read more...]

What do you HAVE to do?

A friend of mine had a rough week recently.  Here was the week in no particular order: Lost parent Made arrangements for funeral Drove 4+ hours to the funeral Went through/packed the parent's things Drove 4+ hours back Co-conducted a 4 day intensive seminar Visited with clients Decorated/furnished new business offices Shut down/moved her old business office That's a hell of week.  I'm sure there are details I missed. I had dinner and beer with them last night.  At some … [Read more...]