Are you choking on an elephant?

I want to change the world.  That's  a problem.  "Change the world" is one big elephant.  It doesn't give many good places to start.  In fact, it's haltingly paralyzing.  As a goal it is insurmountably overwhelming. Have you ever looked up to a role model and said to yourself, "I want to be like him (or her)."?   Maybe you want to be the next Seth Godin, Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg, John Lennon, Martin Luther King, Sarah Palin, etc.   There's just one problem.  You can't.  They already … [Read more...]

I got away with murder.

I got away with murder when I was younger. I didn't have set chores to get an allowance.  I didn't have to study to do well in school.  I didn't do my homework on time.  And often times didn't do it all.  I turned assignments in late.  I cut school.  I was late regularly.  I still graduated in the top 10 percent of my class. I wish I could say I wrote my own rules.  That would be a lie.  It would imply structure that didn't exist.  I just didn't follow the existing rules. I'm 40 now. … [Read more...]

What do you NOT have to do?

I was buzzing around the house completing one task after another.  My goal?  Order.  The arrival of the twins was met by an intense need for order.  Some could call it OCD. I was working in double time.  And I am doing things I don't want to do.  I like order.  I don't like doing the things that create it.  So these are things I have to do.  I need the order to have my mind clear to produce.  I'd rather watch the Colbert Report.  Steve Colbert will take me further from what I need. I get … [Read more...]

What do you HAVE to do?

A friend of mine had a rough week recently.  Here was the week in no particular order: Lost parent Made arrangements for funeral Drove 4+ hours to the funeral Went through/packed the parent's things Drove 4+ hours back Co-conducted a 4 day intensive seminar Visited with clients Decorated/furnished new business offices Shut down/moved her old business office That's a hell of week.  I'm sure there are details I missed. I had dinner and beer with them last night.  At some … [Read more...]

Are you tipping enough?

Jen and I met our twins two months ago.  Our priorities were redefined.  Things like showering, blow drying of hair, eating food while hot fell to the bottom of the list.  Feeding babies, remembering to eat at all, finding 2-3 hours to sleep shot to the top of the list. The babies are kicking our asses.  Feeding two newborns at the same time is one of the most exhausting things I've done in my life.  I go from energetic and enthusiastic to exhausted and exasperated in a matter of … [Read more...]

Thank, God. I am home.

I walked in the door.  I said, "I'm home, Cheech (Chi-chi's one of our dogs)."    A rush of emotion swept through me.  "Thank God, I'm home." I've struggled with my house being my home since I moved here.  It was Jen's house before we met.  There's a lot of history in the house.  There's a lot of ego involve in my fighting making this house my home.  I create meaning that doesn't have to be there that keeps me away. A friend was telling me about the Samurai.  They are not allowed to … [Read more...]

Winning the War

The final piece of paper left my hand.  My signature in place.  The condo was sold.  It was on the market over two years.  We got beaten on price and concessions.  I played this hand poorly.  We did not win this battle. I bought the condo for the wrong reasons.  It was what I thought I was supposed to do.  I bought into the dogma that renting is bad, owning is good.   Owning would make me an adult, I thought.  I bought. My decade of ambition had begun.  The ambition was to be good enough. … [Read more...]

Double the trouble

  The Warheit Twins joined us last week.  Today they are 1 week old.  Sleep has been at a premium.  Jen and I are adapting. We talked with another mom in the waiting room for the babies 48 hour doctor visit.  We talked about when it gets better.  Her observation, "I'm not sure that it gets better.  I think we get better." Shortly after her comment, we realized we were in the wrong doctors office. It's easy to get caught up in waiting for "It" to get better.  When we do that, … [Read more...]

Conceiving the inconceivable

In 10 minutes, I'll be driving my wife to deliver our twins.  I don't have any kids yet.  I can't imagine what it will be like ... other than sleepless for a couple of months.  I don't know what the experience of deliver will be like.  I don't know what it will be like to hold them for the first time.  I don't know the sense of responsibility I will feel when I meet my children. Jen and I launched this baby business around 12 months ago.  We decided to see a doctor to make this happen.  We … [Read more...]

Are you in a compromised position?

The offer came it.  It was low. They asked for thousands in concessions on top of the low offer. I sent a counter. They held their ground. A few days later, they weakened and offered a counter. They didn't offer enough.  It wouldn't have been a compromise. I would have been compromised. A week or so later another offer came in. It was low. They asked for thousands in concessions. I sent a counter. They responded promptly. They offered more than what I asked in my counter. They asked for … [Read more...]