There better be an good reason you don’t read this!

English: Dry cleaners in Stoke Road


Sometimes I get stuck in traffic.  You, too, huh?

I’ll start thinking to myself, “There better be an accident up there!”  When I’m really twisted, I think “Somebody better be hurt!”.

Sometimes the situations different.  Maybe it’s bad service at a restaurant.  I let the manager know.  Then I think, “They better knock something off my bill!”  or “I better get dessert for free!”  Like I need a dessert …

“The DVR better record that show!”  “The light better not turn red!”  “The dry cleaners better be open!”  “There better not be a line!”

Here’s the thing …  The real question:  Or what?!  What will you do if the world doesn’t comply to your threat?!

Will you bring your car to a complete halt in the middle freeway when traffic opens up, inexplicably, with no sign of an accident.  Will you write a letter or boycott the restaurant that doesn’t give you the right comp for their mistake?  Will you take a hammer to your DVR or cancel your monthly service?  Will you run the light?  Will you throw brick through the dry cleaners window and get your clothes yourself?  Will you cut all the way to the front of the line?

Sometimes it’s closer to home.  I come home.  The day’s been long.  I think, “She better have cooked dinner already!”  (For the record, I cook dinner a lot of the time).  Or “The girls better be ready for bed!”  (I don’t even know how Jen get the girls ready for bed on her own.  She’s awesome!).

A friend upset me … “They better apologize!”

Will you go on a hunger strike if dinner isn’t ready?   Will you disown your friend forever if they don’t apologize?

Plenty of times we say, “They better do … (insert something)” and we have no control over it.  We give control over ourselves to the event. the store, the traffic light, the spouse, friend.

We put ourselves in a position to fail and feel powerless.  We might get what we want:  a bloody wreck, a free mediocre tiramisu, the recorded show, the green light, the cooked dinner, the apologetic friend.  But it became an entitlement.  A bare minimum to remain marginally content.  If we don’t get it, we’re often left pissed with no recourse.  Just us and our righteous indignation.

What you think better happen today to make you happy?

You better get over yourself.

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