Like a moth to a flame.

I rushed to the lamp to turn it off.  I had heard a zap.  I smelled something burn.  I looked around.  I saw smoke waft from my lamp.  It was a 6 foot tall torchiere (Think a tall skinny lamp).  The lamp had a halogen bulb.  It burned white hot.  I tilted it so I could see what happened.  There is was.  A charred moth.  I turned the lamp back on.  The moth finished burning.  The smell went away.  Once and a while, I'd hear the zap.  I'd look for the plume of smoke.  I'd smirk and shake my head. … [Read more...]

How to stop finishing last

Nice is a four letter word.  When someone tells me I'm nice, I'm doing something wrong.  I'm not saying something that needs to be said.  Or I'm being a door mat and getting walked on.  I don't want to be a nice guy.  I'd rather be a good guy.  Nice is not a saving grace.  Good is. People seen as highly disagreeable make nearly $10,000 more per year than those seen as highly agreeable. Does that mean you need to become an ass to make more money?  No. It means you need to start adding … [Read more...]

Are you supposed to be here?

One of my favorite movies is Clerks.  It's clever, raw and funny.   There are two lead characters.  One writes his own rules for reality.  The other allows reality's rules to be written for him.  The second guy, Dante, keeps muttering "I'm not even supposed to here." through the movie.  He's torn between what he wants to do and what he feels he's supposed to do. I am most miserable when I think in 'Supposed to'   "I'm supposed to get a merit increase."  "They're supposed to refill my drink." … [Read more...]

Old school – What is limiting job growth?

Jobs.  The latest 4 letter word being thrown across the aisle in Washington ... before Congress took a 1 month vacation.  There is a battle for your hearts, minds, and votes. There is a problem with the jobs debate.  The debate is based on the pre-1992 economy.   We are arguing about an economy that died when new technologies took on life.  We are arguing about a service economy that required people to deliver service.  The post 1992 economy is different. Frederick Winslow Taylor created … [Read more...]

What will you find when you get there?

Get out through the in door or or get in through out door.   Either way, no matter where you are, there you are. Are you trying to get out of where you don't want to be?   Something will follow you.  You. You can't escape yourself. Most of the times we want to get out of something ... it turns out the something we want to get out of is ourselves. That new job won't make you any more valued.   That other guy (or girl) won't  make you any more lovable.  That pint of ice cream won't … [Read more...]

Out through the In Door

I was down in a depressive funk for the last few weeks.  It tends to happen each year as approach my birthday.  This year wasn't an exception.   I was walking in the morning.  Walking in the sunlight is a prescription for the funk.  As I walked I prayed.  I was asking for a way out.  I received an answer. "Stop looking for a way out.  Look for a way in." Looking for a way out isn't about finding something new.  It's about leaving something old.  You're not going anywhere.  You're … [Read more...]

You can have an impact. Will you?

I met Marshall last week.  I was working behind the coffee bar at church.  Out of the busyness of barista-ing, I heard Marshall say, "Excuse me, sir.  I had an accident."  I stopped what I was doing.  I came out from the bar.  Marshall spilled some coffee.  It wasn't a big deal.  Not much of a mess.  He wanted to clean up his own mess.  I saw embarrassment on his face.  We cleaned up his mess together. I sat Marshall in a chair in our common area.  He sat with me in a half sweated through … [Read more...]

Life is beautiful

My friend Mike invited me to play bocce ball.   It was a blast.  It was relaxing.  It was fun.  It was competitive.  After we played we were emailing about how enjoyable it was.  He had this to say. "Playing bocce with the Italians is pretty symbolic of life to me.  You spend your life trying to get as close to a goal as you can… sometimes you get close and other times something in life comes along and knocks you away from your target and you have to refocus and find a new strategy… or … [Read more...]

Where do you belong?

I played bocce ball for the first time last week.  It's hosted by the Italian Club of Dallas (Yes, there is one!).  It was a blast.  I learned a lot about life that night. We played at a country club.  Somehow someone convinced a country club in Texas to convert their clay tennis courts to bocce ball courts.  That's influence! We were playing with one of the members of the club.  At some point, he asked if I was a member.  I said no.  He said, "We need to change that." So often we ask … [Read more...]

Road to nowhere

I drove this morning.  There's a good chance that you did, too.  Did you drive on a road?  Yeah, me too.  The roads I drove on have been around for several decades.  I don't know when they were built.  I'm pretty sure someone built them.  I didn't pay for the roads to be built.  But I'm pretty sure that someone did.   Life would be really different if they weren't built.  Businesses would have a hard time making money.  People would have a hard time getting to work.  There's a pretty valuable … [Read more...]